Sweet Memories

Lately, tender images from my past have been popping up, unbidden: my childhood home, the family cottage in Wisconsin; hikes to alpine lakes and along the ocean coast.

It’s an adage that the elderly live in their memories because that’s all we have. This is especially true for those whose lives have been reduced because of health issues, who can’t partake in their former lives—whether it’s hiking, taking care of grandchildren, volunteering, singing in the choir or gardening. For most seniors, healthy or not, there’s no doubt that life shrinks as we get older: friends die, we move to smaller spaces and avoid city driving or stop driving altogether.  

But there’s a societal judgment that dwelling in the past is not mentally healthy. For one thing, we can put on rose-colored glasses and distort our views of our lives: be overly sentimental about our long-dead parents; remember only the good parts of our work life; or glorify old friendships that may not been as rosy as we want to remember.

Continue reading “Sweet Memories” →
5

Desperately Searching for a Human Being

I was watching a movie from a few years ago and saw a scene that would be considered implausible today, almost laughable. A woman was on the phone with an airline employee, asking if there were any flights out of Mexico the next day. Not only was the woman able to talk to a real person, the airline staffer found a flight and booked it for her. It’s hard to believe there was a time when you could get true customer service. But we seniors can remember—and lament what’s changed.

Last week, I was clearing out old tax returns, some from the 1980s. In one stack I found a postcard from an IRS agent, politely asking me to call her about an unresolved tax issue. Included was her name and phone number. That meant I would have had a direct line to the agent instead of spending an hour going through a phone tree that offered multiple and confusing options. This is the new world we live in, far different than the one most of us grew up in.

Continue reading “Desperately Searching for a Human Being” →
18

To Stay or to Leave

In the early days of Russia’s attack on Ukraine, I saw on CNN an interview with two older women in one of the towns being attacked. Both told the interviewer that they had no plans to evacuate, that they would stay where they were. Because they were standing in front of a large apartment complex, I assumed that was their home and that they were widows. They wore the familiar outfits of older Ukrainian women: long, peasant like dresses, sturdy shoes and babushkas on their heads. They looked like the archetypal grandmother: genial but no nonsense, with their feet solidly planted on their homeland.

I’ve read that Ukraine has one of the highest percentages of elderly in the world: In 2018, more than one-fifth of the country’s population were over the age of 60. That means many older Ukrainians are facing a horrible choice: Should they stay in their homes, which could be bombed or controlled by Russians, or should they flee the place they’ve lived most (or all) of their lives for the safety of another country?

Continue reading “To Stay or to Leave” →
2

Blog at WordPress.com.

Up ↑